Who am I? Why do I blog?
My name’s Ronni and I’ve had this blog, The Screenwriter’s Wife, for a few years now. When it began in 2014, I wasn’t sure what to do with it (or even if I’d be “allowed” to keep it, which is an entirely different, though related, story). This blog has evolved over the years and I’ve evolved as a person with it.
While I always knew I wanted to blog about marriage and family, I originally lacked the confidence to say the things I really wanted to say. Even within the “marriage blogger” world, I felt like no one else was focusing on the really hard stuff that can come up in marriage or speaking honestly about how marriages can actually survive those times. I get it. Most people want to be nice. They’re afraid of saying something “wrong”. They feel they lack the ability to comprehend or empathize with a marriage situation they’d rather not imagine their own marriage ever having to deal with…so as soon as the going gets tough they pass you off to the “professionals” to deal with you instead.
I’m not saying that you shouldn’t go to marriage counseling. You should. In fact, you’ll often hear me recommend resources for counseling or online programs or something, anything, that you can look into to help your marriage wherever it’s at.
But I also recognize that “we should get counseling” is a lot easier said than done in many cases:
– one or both spouses aren’t currently willing to go to counseling
– you can’t afford counseling
– you don’t have the necessary time or childcare available
– you’re not even sure if you really need counseling
– you’re worried that counseling won’t help and then you’ll have nothing left to try
So what do you do then? Mostly likely, you google for answers. Or maybe you scroll through Pinterest or Instagram, but everything you see about marriage there is shiny and pretty and happy or only gives marriage advice for the easier things, like “how to keep dating your spouse”. While, yes, continuing to date your spouse is probably a good thing (and I admittedly promote here in my blog too) – your marriage is far beyond that stage right now. You need help right now.
I am NOT a marriage counselor. I am NOT a therapist. I am in no way “professionally licensed”. (If you need those credentials from someone in order to feel that you can trust them, I get that and that’s totally fine. I recommend going here first: Marriage Friendly Therapists.) I’m just a wife who’s been married for almost 13 years and who’s had hard times in my own marriage. I’m also someone who observes, thinks deeply, and has witnessed the successes and failures of the marriages of my friends and family members as well as read lots and lots of marriage stories out there as well as marriage research articles.
You’re welcome to take all I say with a huge grain of salt if you’d like. But I’m also going to say the things that maybe you need to hear but that no one else is telling you.
I don’t ONLY write about the bad stuff in marriage though. I also write about the happy stuff. And family stuff. And reality in the world of make believe here in Hollywood. I believe that each of our individual lives is extremely complex. My life is complex too. Happy. Sad. Lonely. Fulfilling. Beautiful. Heart-wrenching. Hopeful. We live in a world of questions without easy answers.
And I’m going to attempt to explore the hard questions of marriage (and family life and reality) here in this blog.
If you’d like to know more, or if you like prying into the real meaty questions, see my FAQ section: The Cold, Hard Questions No One Is Asking.
Usual bio info:
I grew up (as the oldest of 6 daughters) in suburban/rural smaller town Texas. After graduating from a small conservative Christian college in the middle of the Bible Belt, I decided to – why not? – move out to Los Angeles to work in the entertainment industry so I could better understand the world.
In those early years I worked traveling on production of reality tv shows. But traveling became harder when I found myself falling in love with a guy named KP – and so, in total opposite of everyone else our age we knew in L.A. – we got married “super young” at 24/25.
Fast forward a dozen years and three kids later and here we are.
During those years, I went back to school and got my teaching credentials, tutored child actors on set, taught high school math, worked at online charter schools, and eventually became a stay-at-home-mom/blogger. KP went from working in development to screenwriting. There was a tv show writers room staff position for a couple years, a tv pilot that sold but not made, a bunch of random stuff to make ends meet, a steady film marketing job, and always more writing on the side. Basically, this is the life here. Always dreaming, always striving for more, always hoping toward the future.
There’s lots of normal people who live and work and breathe and have families here in “Hollywood”, despite what many might believe about the “evil Hollywood industry” supposedly hell-bent on destroying society, lol. Hopefully KP and I can be an example of just another family out there who, though not perfect, still strives to keep our marriage, family, and sanity intact while patiently waiting for our big breaks.
I do social media here (Come follow me!):
Facebook – for sporadically announcing when I’ve posted a new blog post or for my twitter posts to auto-publish to.
Instagram – for daily life and pictures of my cute kids. And because Instagram is the happiest of all the social media and I like it there. 🙂
Twitter – for when I vent about adult things or #momlife things or movies or tv shows I’m watching.
Pinterest – for mommy-ing, inspiration, and pretending I’ve got my life together.
Email List – you can also subscribe to my email list. I admit that I haven’t focused a lot on this list and my emails are sporadic and often rambling, but I’m working on it and trying to be a cooler random addition to your inbox. 🙂
Rambling Ronni spinoff blog – once upon a time, this blog contained a lot of my more personal, deep thought, rambling posts that I dubbed “Rambling Ronni” posts. I still write these kinds of posts but decided to move them over to a new blog entirely so that those who don’t have to be bothered by that kind of stuff no longer have to. You’re more than welcome to come take a look if you reeaally want to get to know me. Or if you like thinking deep thoughts. Or if you miss the ‘old-school’ kind of blogs where people talked about their thoughts instead of just things.